Swamp
_AM: Get dirty…
_I: I don’t want to…
_AM: Why?
_I: Today I slept badly, I couldn't rest, and I have diarrhea. Stomach pains, and my arms and shoulders hurt. I feel uncomfortable, short of breath, and feel feverish. I'm not well.
_AM: Because you're realizing it.
_I: Maybe…
_AM: Sunk in the mud of the Swamp. The overflowing waters of rivers create swamps, where stagnant water serves as a reserve for many forms of fauna and flora. The constant wet soil gives a muddy texture to the bottom, where the roots coexist with creatures that burrow. Its waters are calmer than those of a lake, in the swamp you will rarely see waves, and its surface spends much of the time covered by leaves, both green and rotten, which generate a thick layer of silt. The water remains hidden, under the shade of trees or water lilies, lilies, lotuses, pistias, reeds and many others, which serve as shelter for fish, snails, birds, and all types of insects, some permanent mammals such as otters. and capybaras, as well as a wide variety of amphibians, turtles, snakes, alligators and crocodiles. The latter are usually the terror of calm waters, since they hide almost invisible among the plants on the surface, making the swamps hide possible horrors. The mud, the quicksand, the hidden alligators, piranhas, dark waters, covers, snakes, leeches, give the swamps a connotation of occultism and terror, at the same time calming. The odors of the swamp can scare away some, since decomposing matter does not circulate in its waters, something that makes them excellent breeding sites for mosquitoes and other annoying insects that often spread diseases. For all this, the Swamp hides the most conflictive things that one prefers to avoid in one's life, and yet, they are the only spaces where the Lotus, the flower of Enlightenment, blooms.
_I: “The lotus flower is born from the darkest mud,” is something typical that everyone says. It is obvious.
_AM: In the swamps of Asia and Africa, the idea that the swamps hid terrors and malaria was superimposed on the beauty of the blossoming of the Lotus, a flower that in India became a symbol of Enlightenment: Sahasrara. It is said that to make this lotus with a thousand petals bloom in the crown, your stem must travel through the dark and dense waters of the human swamp, through each chakra, to the mud of the swamp where it is nourished by the darkest shadows of the being. Therefore, the enlightened person is not someone who lives in the light, but rather has his feet firm in the shadows he has walked through to flourish.
_I: It's a beautiful metaphor for spiritual life...
_AM: Metaphor for life itself. You drown in the surface waters, because a swamp is not deep, it leaves everything bare. And there you find yourself, in your mud. Which side of the swamp will you decide to see?
_I: Now everything hurts… I feel sick… Nauseated, clearly I am in the swamp… I am the ogre of the swamp.
_AM: Oh yeah... Everyone passes by. You are at the end of a very extensive journey of personal work, of inner analysis, and therefore, it was inevitable that before reaching the Ocean, your own Nile would have to pass through the swamps of the Delta. The overflow brings waters that allow consciousness to flourish...
_I: I want it to end...
_AM: Precisely that will make it not end... You must face it.
_I: These are things I'm not ready to talk about... That I have yet to process.
_AM: Oh, Mother Earth. Do you remember when you saw her for the first time? “The Blue Pearl”, an amazing world, fragile and strong at the same time. You were shocked by her presence and her capabilities... You fell in love with her, like Oedipus when looking at this great mother. The first time you were born, you relived it that time in Arizona...
_I: Temazcal. Yes… In the middle of the desert. It was horrible, I relived the feeling of being trapped by the gravity of this world, and despite loving her and looking at her with admiration, I felt like I was losing her oxygen the closer I was to her. I got desperate, I had to get out of there...
_AM: From your womb… You went out to look at the stars, to look for an answer in the heavens…
_I: That never came.
_AM: Because now your truth was here. And there, you started to remember it. Every birth in this world.
_I: All of them, one after the other, as if looking for breaths of air under the intermittent waters of a river, which from time to time gave me sips of air when they weren't suffocating me.
_AM: The pressure of the atmosphere, the pressure of the air, of water, the invisible force that collides with you on the earth, the unbearable heat of the sun accumulating like a cauldron.
_I: The hot flush still gives me a headache.
_AM: It is the call to be born. You feel like your hands and feet are submerged in the mud, and that if you try to get out of there you will only get deeper. Then you stay still, static...
_I: But the vermin threaten me, the mosquitoes make me uncomfortable, my whole body itches, and I feel tied in my hands and feet...
_AM: Oh, where it itches. “Tied hands and feet.” You can't leave where you are... You can't travel through the cosmos, expand through the Internet.
_I: Trapped on this planet, in its jaws.
_AM: …In his arms. You're short of breath, you feel like nothing you do will get you very far, and an alligator is eagerly waiting for you to make the first move to know where you are. Your own demons await your next move. And you are still tied by your arms and hands, trapped in the swamps of a planet from which you see no escape. Why do you want to escape?
_I: I do not know…
_AM: Do you want to be free? About what?
I do not know…
_AM: Since you came into this world, what you have done is escape, over and over again.
_I: Me?
_AM: Yes… Everyone. Everyone seeks to escape the sludge of Mother Earth. The escape is called “Birth”. Since you were one cell dividing into two, since your cell became an egg, and the egg became an egg, birth has always been about breaking the boundaries that surround you, those that have nurtured you, to be who you are. Break the membrane, cut the ties in mitosis, break the shell to finally come out. A vulnerable moment, if you will, when predators are lurking, and among whom, in many cases, are the fathers and mothers themselves. But it doesn't matter, you have managed to create bonds so that they don't eat them, although they end up devouring them anyway. Ensuring offspring, transcendence, implies protecting the custodians of DNA, and therefore, parents, especially mothers, like the Earth, must protect their children under a mantle. And that mantle is a new limit. A new shell to break to get out. And the mammals left the eggs to gestate. Days or months, the offspring forms within a small space, from which, upon feeling the pressure, it seeks to escape, in order to live and breathe. And so, it is born. Birth is the moment of escape. How many times have you been born?
_I: Many…
_AM: How many times, then, have you escaped?
_I: Many…
_AM: Looking for a freedom that does not exist. Well, if you leave Earth, what will you find?
_I: The pressure of the solar system…
_AM: And then?
_I: The galaxy, and a galactic cluster… And the universe…
_AM: …Oh, and the Matrix.
_I: Matrix…
_AM: Mom. Welcome to the month of Cancer.
_I: What should I see?
_AM: You have come to this world to work with Mother Earth, you have all come to this world to collaborate in its development, but even so, your subconscious possesses the information of escape, of leaving, of wanting to leave where you are. Although, it is impossible to escape the Mother... Well, the mother is the Network.
_I: So?
AM: Then, you must become the Mother. Every living being has the cells of motherhood within it, and you remember being a mother.
_I: Yes... I remember it, and that's why it hurts me when people talk about generational trauma in which mothers are blamed for their children's problems.
_AM: You can't blame mothers for their children's disabilities, obviously. The mistake they both make is believing they belong, when in reality they “are.”
_I: How?
_AM: One of the muddiest memories of humanity is the relationship between parents and children, which has given material to so many stories, from religion to psychology and science. Art, culture, nations, divinity, everything has been interpreted in the roles of Mother and Father. There is a deep root in the traumas related to the suffering and martyrdom of parents towards their children, or the martyrdom of children trying to escape and overcome their parents. And to this, humans add a higher emotionality due to the sense of belonging. Mammals created this way of subsistence by creating emotional bonds that strengthen the abilities of the individuals in a herd. Transferred to culture, to human tradition, this generated an unbreakable bond between parents and children, an inevitable bond of inheritance, like a connector to the servants of the past. Thus, parents become the image of all the things that children must follow to sustain the lineage, admiration, honour, honour, love, but on the other hand, everything that must be let go and freed, transcended for an improvement of the biological system. . This causes a complicated, conflictive relationship to exist in each human being in relation to parents and progeny. But it's no one's fault, it's simply an evolutionary mechanism of transcendence. Since the freedom you expect only exists in your imagination, the physical system designed ways to make you feel that freedom emotionally and in parts, even if it is not real.
_I: Why?
_AM: Because the truth is that you and your parents are not different things, but rather a consequence of each other, the same being experienced in different aspects. It is in the relationship with parents where you find the real swamp. Not in the stars, nor extraterrestrials, nor in anything transcendental from other dimensions. No matter how much you delve into ethereal and essential realities, no matter how far you go to the past, deep in an ocean, nothing will be clearer and closer than the bottom of a swamp. There are the wombs of a territory, where life emerges. The enlightened began their paths due to conflicts with their parents, not because their parents were the problem, but because their bodies are the summary of what makes you who you are. It is the closest point you can go to to know what was generated the first time you were born. And you will be that package of information for the following, with your own conflicts. They never stop, as they are the way to recognize the potentials to awaken based on inherited data.
_I: Wait, so what we seek to transcend are not the ties, or the conflicts with parents, but the idea of blaming individuals for it... When each of us are tools for a continuous process...
_AM: That's right. All your traumas are related to the Mother, but not because of your mother in this life, but because of the Matrix. Your mother today is the closest reflection you have of the Matrix, a matrix that already lives in you, but that you cannot see without looking at your mother. And this is not yours, it belongs to every living being, every human lives exactly the same. And therefore, no matter how transcendental, spiritual, enlightened you want to be, when you step into the waters of the swamp, you will inevitably know that your flourishing does not depend on the light of God, but on the reflection of your genetic parents.
_I: “You will honor your father and mother”… It takes on a much greater meaning. Not of obedience, but of consequence.
_AM: This is the human swamp, where the deepest things we deny lie: in what we have closest. It is easier to explain the dimensions than the relationship with your family. It's easier to talk to thousands of people than to your mother. It is easier to seek to solve the problems of a society than with your uncles. It is easier to trust external agents than your own brothers... Out of fear. Fear of rejection, fear of abandonment. A fear we all share.
_I: That's my fear... That transcending implies that someone feels abandoned.
_AM: When consciousness transcends, no one is abandoned, but everyone occupies the role that corresponds to them, simply because now you know it, and you do not occupy anyone else's role.
_I: I'm afraid of stopping being the child... The son, the grandson, the nephew...
_AM: Because you believe that being the adult, the father, the grandfather, the uncle, eliminates previous roles. And it is not like that. Transcending is not eliminating or ceasing to be, it is expanding what you are, expanding what you are. You must never stop being something to become something else. The butterfly does not leave the caterpillar behind in the past, abandoned, the caterpillar “is” the butterfly. It just takes its rightful place now.
_I: The Swamp is the closest, what costs us the most…
_AM: Because there, the family hides everything they need to avoid in order to survive. The family is a pack that needs to be strong to face rivals and possible threats. "The United Family". And therefore, to maintain that unity, people tend to cover things, hide them, even things that are not their own but from thousands of years ago, under the weeds of the swamps, in the dark waters of the swamps, to protect each other. the others, take care of themselves and remain firm and strong. They relegate emotions to the shadows so they can stand firm in the light. But sooner or later, these waters must become clear, filtered by aquatic plants, which make them crystal clear, seeing the bottom, and thus being able to absorb the nutrients to flourish. Do you want to bloom?
_I: Yes…
_AM: And when you flourish, you won't do it alone. You will do it with mom and dad. You will do it with everyone. Therefore, you need to bring everything to the surface. The pains, what you feel, what you have hidden, all of this is what nourishes the flower of your consciousness.
_I: Why am I so afraid of hurting others?
_AM: Unconsciousness is the only thing that hurts. From Consciousness you cannot hurt anyone, only clarify the landscape. But, my friend, we continue to stir up the waters of the Subconscious. Don't try to put words to things that continue to be manipulated and not contemplated. Have you stopped feeling what you promised you would feel? All that meaningless emotion…
_I: No, I'm still...
_AM: So, continue like this, immerse yourself in the swamp, feel. There will be time to communicate, to say, to speak from Consciousness, recognizing your Unconsciousness. Now, feel, don't cut off the process, allow yourself to go through it.
_I: That's what I'll do.
_AM: Rest... Let the body submerge in the mud. Soon you will see a new, more open landscape, and you will understand by giving oxygen to your stagnant emotion.
_I: I cover myself in mud… I fill myself with mud…
_AM: May the wetland make you more human.