Ego
_I: When we talked about coherence, you mentioned that Ego means I, and that without the I you cannot reach the Am. You also said that selfishness is the movement of the self, and egocentrism is the belief that one is the center of everything. But tell me, what truly is the Self?
_AM: The I is several things, but one of them is the construction of all external factors. The Self is the result of data, information accumulated through your biological history, both from the species that have made you live today and from your own family tree. The Self is a cultural construction, which has shaped your way of speaking, thinking, feeling, acting to live in harmony with the environment that surrounds you. It is in turn the result of all your experiences, and the final product of the Stars that condition your personality. It is all your attributes and your weaknesses, your mistakes and your successes. It is the construction of the person. Who you say you are, how you present yourself, how the world knows you. And it is the center from which all your relationships and links with others are generated, since the Self is the point of reference that makes others know who you are and what you are in relation to them.
_I: So I am almost an anchor, a mirror, I am the result of external factors. It's like when you explained to me that the tree is not green, but rather the refraction of the ranges of light that are divided in the photosynthesis process carried out by chlorophyll, and our eyes see said color due to our ability to perceive said range of light, but it does not mean that the trees are green, but rather it is the color that I can see of the tree. The Self would be like that color, which is the result of many mechanisms that make it who it is, even if it is not real.
_AM: Exactly. All external factors refer to every force that has shaped who I am, from the biological to the experientially personal, including the climate, the territory in which I am born, the culture and religion, how my parents have treated me, or whether I didn't have them; all the factors of the world that surround us, modify and mold the Self.
_I: And why the stars?
_AM: Because everything is connected, and even if in society it is believed that things are separated by distance, in the microcosm distance does not exist. The stars that are hundreds or thousands of light years away, for the universe, are light that you see and perceive, like the green of the tree. They are and they are not, they exist and they do not exist, but they modify our internal world when we see them, even if what we see is the past. All light you see in the sky does not live in the present, but is the past of each star, the time it takes for the light to reach you; So, in the same way, this relativity means that the particles that make up those stars are the same ones that make you up, and when you are born, it is as if your light combined with theirs. Thus, you occupy a new individual space in creation, and receive the seal of the stars that observe you. Think about what is closest to you: how do you feel in spring, in summer, in autumn and winter?
_I: I'm different, I act different. In spring one is happier and more eager to do things, when in winter one is more inward, thoughtful. In the fall, there may be more depression, and in the summer everything is upset.
_AM: Well, if the seasons change your Self every 3 months, think now about the Moon and the Sun. Day and night influence your mood, the way you are in life. The Moon, with its gravity, drives the tides in the oceans, creating waves, moving the waters of the world; and you, human, are 70% water and emotion. This is why it influences creativity, emotions, and the menstrual cycle. Then, you have Venus, and Mars, and the farther away you go, the more subtle the modification or effect on you. If the Sun shows what you are during the day to others, the Moon will show what you are inside, at night. Venus, Mercury and Mars will influence your daily attitudes in relation to communication, love and the will to act. Meanwhile, Jupiter and Saturn mark something more distant, your purposes, challenges and missions, something that is not everyday, but is far away on the horizon. And then, the imperceptible, your subconscious and unconscious, the search for inner truth, the spiritual path of Uranus and Neptune, to find death on Pluto at the end of the path. And the constellations that surround all the planets are the character, essence, with which you will face each of these levels. Thus, astronomy and astrology are one, one more factor that modifies your being. But perhaps for many this is too far away. So, you must go to the center of your own solar system: Your plexus.
_I: The solar plexus, the pit of my stomach…
_AM: Tell me, where do you get nourishment before you are born?
_I: Because… The umbilical cord?
_AM: Of which today only your navel remains as a seal. Your first contact with the reception of external information is the cord that goes to the plexus, to nourish your being. This cord not only transports food, nutrients, but also emotions, sensations, thoughts, which come to you through the first being to which you are linked...
_I: …My Mother.
_AM: You, then, are the Earth, the center of your life system, but everything that comes to you, you owe to your mother, the first closest star you have in your life: the Moon. This is where the real construction of your personality begins. The internal world that nourishes your being is the information of the waters that your Mother moves, just like the Moon in the heavens. In the darkness, she is the only one you can trust until you see the light of day. When you leave the cave, from the night of creation, from the waters and the emotion, you see the light, and with that light, the face of the Father, the Sun. Thus, your life begins to rely on both forces: dad and mom, the sun and the moon. Your life revolves around both, and day by day you live closer, sometimes to one and sometimes to the other, expressing yourself, experimenting in the game, integrating learning, and transcending the unnecessary. That is, you live your spring, summer, autumn and winter. So, throughout life, you awaken the strength of play, of friends, of conflicts between your parents, siblings and friends, the struggle to grow, and you see Mars in his face. Until your emotion for the beauty of life awakens, and you fall in love, awakening the force of Venus in adolescence. As you grow in the experience of Venus and Mars, you begin the quest to find yourself in learning and sharing with others, the presence of Mercury. And when you finish adolescence, school, you set a long-term life project, your purpose, what you want to be as an adult and what you want to be successful at. Our profession is Jupiter, who lives in the faces of our idols and role models; But in order to obtain what we seek we must go through the harsh tests of life, the professors, teachers, bosses with the face of Saturn. And one day, you realize that everything you were looking for does not satisfy you, and you begin to search for answers that are beyond you, you search for the path of truth, the answers that you will find in the spiritual or philosophical, and in the teachers. In life you will see the face of Uranus, until you realize that everything others can teach you lies within you, in the vast oceans of your internal world, where you find the most hidden answers in the subconscious and you see yourself like Neptune. Thus you realize that the only way to emerge as a new human, a new Self, is by letting the old die, the crisis of being and existence, which you will see with the face of Pluto.
_I: My life is almost a path through the cosmos…
_AM: And everyone you meet, in your family, friends, loves, teachers, enemies; They are all planets in your own solar system.
_I: What if I haven't had a father, or mother... Or friends... Or brothers, or loves?
_AM: Just because you don't see them doesn't mean you don't have them. Tell me, don't you have a father?
_I: Now yes… Well, I always had him actually, but I didn't meet him until I was 27 years old.
_AM: And who was your Sun?
_I: For a while I thought he was my grandfather... Although he wasn't very present, I didn't recognize him as a father. My mother was both, Sun and Moon. Although, I do know that since I was born, I was able to see the light of those who were in another dimension. Kuen, my guide was there from the first moment.
_AM: That is to say that your father, in your subconscious, was not from this dimension, and your Sun was not visible, but etheric.
_I: Yes, from psychology it could be interpreted that I made an emotional transfer. That is, not having a father, I imagined one to make up for that absence.
_AM: However, he is a father. No?
_I: Yes…
_AM: The conflict of psychology is that it remains in the trauma of absence and does not strengthen the ability of the being to complete the empty spaces. The physical absence of your father meant that your solar system had no center, and therefore, no limits. For, in an etheric Sun, time and space are eternal. Thus, your Universe was not limited, and you were able to hear me, remember your entire history, remember the Cosmos that is your Father, and amplify your family to all of Humanity.
_I: So my Self freed itself from limitations… Thanks to not having had a father…
_AM: The greatest gift your father gave you in this life was not being present since you were born. Sometimes we think that to be a perfect being we need all the correct agents of a family: “mom, dad, brother, sister, grandfather, grandmother, uncle, aunt, cousin, cousin…”, as if that were normal. Normal comes from the word “Natural”, that is, Norma in Latin, what is usual or frequent. However, what is repetitive is not evolutionary, since what evolves is precisely what makes the difference. The Self must go beyond the normative to discover its potential and not repeat the same cycles. Absences, crises, breaks in ties make us grow.
_I: Yes, I have noticed that. In a way, within me, there is an imperative need for us all to be in perfection, that the family must always be in its best state, that no one fights, that we can all always be friends, etc., but it is very complicated... I have experienced it, the fact of losing the relationship with part of my family and with friends, in these last two years there have been instances in my life that have destroyed the old Matías, but that have allowed a new, transcendental one to emerge, which He feels free, without any weight, deeply loving all the people that in these two years I lost as family and friends, or at least that I lost in the way in which I hoped to have them.
_AM: Exactly. You haven't lost anyone, you've gained a new perspective. The voids that other people leave in our lives modify our solar system to let in new worlds, and that does not eliminate the previous ones, because you carry them within you, and if you love them in their presence and in their absence, you will have understood that Changes only make us move forward, a crisis is always an opportunity for both.
_I: Last year, my Ego felt hurt in many ways, many people I loved very much disappeared from my life, and above all, it was by my own choice. I felt that the circumstances in which we were interacting were not the best for me or them.
_AM: What aspects of your personality caused your own solar system to become out of whack?
_I: I am a communicator, but I am very afraid to talk to those I love the most. I close down at the slightest conflict, I lose words, and a defense mechanism is activated that prevents me from solving any type of problem. I do not tolerate discussion, I do not know how to fight or impose a vision on that of the other. So instead of speaking, I walk away silently. This has caused many people to shy away or think of me as a child throwing tantrums. And the truth is that I always felt like a child. Even today, I live life as a child. With the same illusion, and sometimes that destroys. I saw in my environment that some people used me, and others that expected much more from me than I could give. Of course there were mistakes on their part, but it was also a mistake on my part not knowing how to manage it ahead of time. And in the last instance, I made the decision to walk away, to separate the bond.
_AM: And how does that make you feel?
_I: Like a failure. I don't feel bad or sad, something that always used to happen to me. Not anymore, in fact, I feel liberated, as if I had understood that it was necessary to leave a space between some family members and some friends. But I see it as a failure to the Unit.
_AM: Unity does not mean being Together. The planets have a lot of space between them, otherwise they could collide. That's what happens when instead of each one following their orbit, they try to get closer, converging with the orbit of the others. The planets collide. The Ego is that which tries to keep everyone in their orbits, in themselves.
_I: And it is also that which makes us look only from our point of view, and fight for mere perspectives, which do not exist...
_AM: Ah, but the Self does not know that.
_I: And who knows?
_AM: I know it, the I AM. The Am is the one who possesses all perspectives, the one who understands the logic of all the different I's that make up the solar system. The Am is gravity, it is the space between the planets. It's what you don't see if you don't pay attention. If you count the stars in the sky you will see separate lights consuming themselves, if you count the space you will see the meaning they make between them, you will see the constellation and you will be able to tell its story. The stars and planets move away from each other, consume their own energy, but still, they are part of the constellation. Nobody you separate from ceases to exist, since you can bring many people together in the same place without them feeling united, but you can feel the unity between many people who are separated. It all depends on your Self's ability to accept those worlds and stars that surround you. The Earth spins on itself, and when you see the sun, you don't see the stars, that doesn't mean they aren't there. In the translation process, sooner or later, you will see them. But if you do not move for fear that your Ego will lose its axis, then you will hardly change your point of view around the Sun. The Ego is an axis in your rotation, it is your north pole and south pole, it has its negative and positive aspects. , and it is not perfect, because it is its imperfection that allows it to change its views.
_I: Evolution depends on the I, then, and not on the Am. Is that?
_AM: Evolution is the adaptation to change, the I cannot see the change, because it is everything here and now, only the I can transform itself on the journey, it can be nourished by other worlds or people, by different landscapes, crises , conflicts, joys, voids and plenitudes. The Self is the result of constant change. It is the history covered and the will to continue doing so. Don't take failure as a defeat, but as an impulse to find a better way to do it. Well that's your nature. Your personality relies on your ability to adapt to mistakes.
_I: …All the paths or teachers and spiritual guides that say that the Self is that part that must be dominated and controlled by the spiritual Consciousness, that the Ego is confusion and distances us from the clarity of the spirit, what do you have to tell me? of it?
_AM: Tell me, who is the best artist: Raphael, Monet or Picasso?
_I: Well… It depends on what kind of art you like.
_AM: So can you judge the Ego by its art?
_I: You say that the Ego, beyond an egoic concept, is an artist... right?
_AM: Each Ego is itself an artist who has discovered a different way of making art. That is, to perceive the World. They are all painters, they all together make up Art, which is the I Am. However, it is the Ego that has given the originality, the one that became an artist within art. If all artists had the clarity of spirit, all the canvases and walls of history would be white. For the divine Consciousness can only see that all potentialities coexist in the same particle, and the greatest possible clarity is to contemplate that particle radiating the essential energy. The beauty you see in the world, in creation, in art, in music, in architecture, in religion, in science, in education, in sports, in everything you can think of, is thanks to the perspectives of the Ego. Stop trying to fight to control the artist that lives in you! Each person you meet, each emotion that binds you to them, each relationship, trauma, conflict, experience, separation, falling in love, joy, fun and resolution that you have experienced is what makes you original, evolutionary, capable of showing different forms. Why would divinity have created all this, just to discover what it already knows?
_I: Awaken the potential of the Ego…
_AM: The potential of the Ego is what nourishes the I Am, because when the Ego, the I, realizes what it is capable of, it raises its head and understands what It Is. Thus, it unites with me, the I Am, and creativity becomes Creation, and separation becomes Unity.
_I: All the emotions that live in me from everything I experienced, is what makes me see the colors, the shapes, the facts, the purposes in specific, unique ways, the construction of my personality from external facts, It is what allows me to discover my internal capacity…
_AM: The I Am lives in you, you just have to discover it, and the only way to do it in life is through the I. He lives, then, being yourself, he feels without fear of letting go, of losing or gaining ties. Remember that you are the center of your solar system, and that no matter how far away others are, the force of gravity, which you will call Love, will inevitably unite them. Sometimes moving away is simply preventing the planets from colliding, creating the total destruction of both celestial bodies. Find your Axis, awaken the artist in you, stop fighting with the only force that moves you in life, be yourself once and for all, and there you will feel me.
_I: I Am who I Am.