Darkness
_I: Why is it so difficult for everyone to accept our shadows?
_AM: Because your entire life has been based on seeking the light and escaping the darkness.
_I: In what sense?
_AM: In all of them. The first single-celled organism on the planet to emerge to the surface did so by escaping the dark and cold depths of the ocean abyss to seek the heat of the sun and carry out photosynthesis. From algae, and other organisms that ate algae, they found in the development of the eyes a way to identify light, find it and identify the objectives, basically food. From there, they spread across the land. Trees seeking sunlight, reptiles needing its warmth, mammals living according to daylight hours. Humans discovered how to dominate fire, and took possession of the Sun in their hands, carrying the light that guides the night. The sun on the horizon marks the paths, purposes, life, destiny; and then stories, worldviews, religions all become decorations around sunlight. The Sun becomes a symbol of kings, of God, of everything that is good, because light gives security. When a child is born, he emerges from the dark caverns of the womb seeking the light where he finds freedom and expansion. Light and the Sun are the great protectors from attacks by predators, larger mammals, which can attack and kill at night. Thus, the Light of the Sun becomes the symbol of the fight against darkness, and it is believed in the subconscious that it is in the night where evil is found, what is dark, what bothers me, the enemy. The antagonist of our adventure, which shows us our weaknesses. Thus, everything bad, what makes us weak, what we hate, what we do not accept or recognize both in others and in ourselves, is found in the shadows. Thus, the white is considered closest to the light, and the dark to the shadows.
_I: One of the keys to racism…
_AM: Precisely. On an emotional level, everything that I feel is sinful, that is not worthy of normality, the negative thoughts, the things that are prohibited, the secret world of our thoughts and desires, what we do not like about ourselves, what we want to hide from the rest, which makes us weak; All of this is placed in the shadows, hidden from the light because of the shame that comes with having it in oneself. Like a garbage dump, the shadows become the garbage dump of the being, where bugs, insects, bacteria, viruses that feed on this garbage breed. But just like in your society, the garbage, what you don't want to see, is thrown into the backyard, where it contaminates, poisons the water, generates gases, generates the greenhouse effect, and everything returns to our lives, harming us even more. The shadows return to us in one way or another what we have thrown into them for not wanting to see it, they return to us the result of what we have hidden, and when we see it in front of us, we call it the enemy, the darkness.
_I: So, everything bad that happens to us is nothing more than the boomerang effect of what we ourselves have thrown into the shadows...
_AM: Who is to blame for planetary pollution: the businessman who built the factory or the people who buy the product?
_I: It's a symbiosis... Both generate the conflict.
_AM: Therefore, hating darkness, not accepting it, is precisely the irresponsibility of not knowing how to manage one's own garbage and waste. If we learned to reuse that energy by giving it a new purpose, perhaps garbage dumps would cease to exist at night.
_I: So the shadows, the ones we have placed as enemies, only feed on what we give them... Right?
_AM: First of all, considering darkness as the enemy of light is typical of a planet located in the vital orbit of a small star like the Sun. The fact that there are 12 hours of light and 12 of average darkness, generates in the subconscious an idea that assigns attributes to each person based on experience. It is normal to think that the night is where evil moves, if from the beginning of your species it was during the night that attacks from predatory animals were received. Just as it is normal for a person who has suffered abuse from his father to have a certain mistrust or fear of all the men he knows. Generalization is an act of survival that attributes to the environment the attributes of the event that occurred in that context. You well know that on planets with more than one sun where night has no influence, their beings do not have a subconscious overloaded with fears and prejudices. Just like a world with distant suns, where life has prospered anyway, shadow and night will be the natural spaces of comfort and harmony. It all depends on the perspective, the experience obtained in one environment or another.
_I: And what is the origin of that darkness that we fear so much on a divine level...? The devil, and those things... That is, many consider that everything we experience is a trap from a higher entity, or from the systems of darkness, they give it many names.
_AM: They are all summed up in the word “Irresponsibility”. The word responsibility comes from the Latin “respondere”, that is, having the “ability to respond” to an adverse circumstance. Blaming a being or system for your own inabilities to manage them and trigger a response to the conflict that is productive and transcendental to it, makes you irresponsible. Believing that the evils in your life are due to a demon or enemy is not being able to cope with the inner power that goes above all of this. Darkness emerged alongside light, because at the moment the initial explosion generated matter, all the light that emerged caused shadows in the particles. Darkness is simply the absence of light. Light is the only thing capable of causing shadow.
_I: But then why is space dark, black?
_AM: Because your eyes cannot see the distant light in the confines. Your ocular capacity is limited to the solar system in which you are located, and star dust and gas clouds limit your vision, as well as the distance, which makes the radiation waves of light and energy not perceptible.
_I: So everything is Light or absence of Light...
_AM: Exactly. Said this way, there is nothing and no one against the Light...
_I: But… I myself have experienced darkness in my life, I have felt demons, I have had to deal with them. Where do these systems of density, “darkness” and shadows come from?
_AM: In the beginning, pure light expands, creating energy. Energy generates atoms, molecules, complex structures, chemical elements. They collide, refracting light into different vibration waves. The larger the waves, the more the light will be distorted as it travels through space, creating what your eyes perceive as colors. These colorful ranges continue to diversify depending on the imperfections of the matter, which refracts the light more and more, creating more dissonance in the waves, creating different frequencies. The more the light expands and refracts, the greater the number of colors there will be; which, when divided by billions, will give the appearance of darkness. So who created darkness?
_I: …The forms… The matter, which arises from the same energy.
_AM: The same light that has created energy generates the appearance of matter, and it is matter that creates patterns, that limits the journey of light, that distorts its own path. It's like taking a smooth, flat surface through which light expands, and deciding to wrinkle that surface, in which you will get mirages, reflections. That the greater the number of wrinkles, the greater the number of colors you will see, and in the cracks of these undulations, shadows will be projected, the absence of light. Now, raise a very high mountain in the middle of the surface, and you will see that the light, as if it were wind, disperses in all directions, since its apparent straight line begins to be expanded through the deformation of the terrain, now without a straight path, but in all directions. Space is the product of light, and it is the same space that modifies light, changing its meanings. “God created the Human so that he could create Him.” So the light begins to chase itself, crossing over its own paths, modifying itself in so many thousands of ways that it creates parallel universes, a labyrinth that you call reality, a framework that you call the Web. And the more the fabric is intertwined, the greater It is the limitation, deforming the pure concept of light into colors, from colors to shadows, modifying your observation of geometry, turning the tetrahedron into fire, the cube into salt, the octahedron into a seed, the dodecahedron into a drop of water, to the icosahedron on a planet. Each one with its own address. So tell _I: does every human have the same purpose in life? Does every animal follow the same path? Is a child the same as a lion and a spider? Are the bat and the butterfly the same?
_I: No... I mean, they have the same essence, but they are not the same, they are unique.
_AM: So, in the same way that there are species in this dimension and world, there are species in other dimensions, and within each species, there are individuals, each with their own path. Demons are another of the many creatures that exist on the various paths.
_I: I remember that we called darkness “constructors of realities.”
_AM: They are like ants or bees, who build their own world by devouring the external one, and they will not hesitate to sting if you get in their way. Ah! Now that I think about it, doesn't this sound very human to you too? What if humans are demons for the beings you call demons?
_I: Good point… It would be like thinking that for cows and chickens and pigs, all humans are murderers, genocidal.
_AM: Depending on where you stand, one aspect of the light will always appear to have shadows and be darkness. When you see that the builders of realities are no longer distorters of light with the aim of building their own worlds, in the same way that you cut down a tree to make a table, you kill an animal or plant to eat, you break a mountain to build a house; You free yourself from the idea that there is a superior force that dominates you, because you realize that you do the same with other forces that you consider inferior. The darkness, which you so vilely refer to, is nothing more than another being trying to create its life, like you. You are darkness, for you were born from the distortion of light. It is not spirituality, this is logic.
_I: The first step to accept our shadows, then, is to recognize that they arise from light, and that by accepting them as part of a natural system of evolution, I can recycle them to improve my personal evolution.
_AM: The fight between light and darkness exists only in the human subconscious, which when taken to the human unconscious generates an eternal battle between the absurd concept of “good and evil.” Nobody is good or bad, there are only beings more distorted than others. But they are all light. When you manage to see the light in the darkest places, you will recognize the truth, that everything was only One.
_I: So, the I is the darkness, and the Am is the light. The I is the distortion of light with all its colors and chakras and emotions, while the I Am is the essential light that connects everything, that gives it meaning.
_AM: The great conflict of being in the shadows is that you can get lost in the labyrinth, and due to the Ego's infinite capacity for creation, your paths can lead you further and further away from the general idea. But I tell you again, I, the Am, do not care how far you go. Unlike your ideas of the gods, I do not care if you distance yourself from me, I have no attachment to your being, I do not need you to be on the right path of the spirit, I do not seek your praise nor do I expect you to honor me or never. deny me, nor do I prohibit you from worshiping false idols or prophets, because the Am knows that it inhabits everything, and that no matter where you go, I will be there, it does not matter if you get lost, because for me there is no labyrinth...
_I: So what do you expect from me?
_AM: Take a map. The journey is long, and millions of things can happen, you can take thousands of paths that take you through light and shadows, but if you know the map, our map, then you can travel through them without getting lost, knowing where you are, being responsible for the path you choose.
_I: I understand... It is not a question of following the light or the shadow, it is not a question of escaping, it is a question of knowing all the paths, of traveling them without fear.
_AM: The map of creation is full of conflicts, and your emotions, your experiences, are the tools. On a long trip like this, you will need a Swiss army knife, one of those that has many options for use. That is your emotional level. Everything you consume on your way will become your fuel. If you know the map, you know where to go, and you will know how to use the tools.
_I: So… How do I face my shadows?
_AM: Recognizing that they are part of your light, of your path. That if you recycle them, they will be useful to you. Fears, desires, everything that is hidden within you, is power, is strength. Your weaknesses are what make you great, your mistakes are what make you wise, your desires are what drive you, your negative thoughts are what build your reality. Give them a purpose, write them down, talk about them, let them out. The path becomes heavier carrying a bag of garbage, which you could easily use to turn into compost, harvest and thus nourish yourself. Darkness is that tool that you have at your disposal to find the path of light, because darkness is nothing more than light dispersed in hundreds of paths.
_I: So when I deny my darkness, I am blocking part of my map, and I do so thinking that by denying those paths I will find the straight path to enlightenment.
_AM: It is a serious mistake for humans to think that the Sun lives in the east because they see it rise there. The more you travel east to see the house of the sun, the more you will find yourself in the west, where you thought it set, where you thought it was the sunset and the defeat of the light. For the Light is always there, for the light is the map itself. Don't be afraid to walk its paths. Go inside yourself. Can you see your shadows?
_I: Yes…
_AM: And what do you see?
_I: Tyranny, control… It's the first thing I observe.
_AM: You hide your power to guide and direct for fear of awakening a tyrant in you. Take the energy of the tyrant, look firmly at your horizon, say to yourself: “all this is mine”, let your tyrant feel like emperor of his inner world, and turn him into the ruler of your shadows. Give it a purpose, and it will order your map. That aspect of you, he's just waiting for you to give him a sense of being. You will not become a tyrant if you give him a task, because he will be spending his energy on something productive inside you, putting order in your life.
_I: There is also… Manipulation…
_AM: Oh, that's a very common one... All humans manipulate, it's a useful reaction to survive in a hostile environment. From the word, from the emotion. There is no need to manipulate with aggression, you can also do it with crying, right?
_I: In my shadows is crying as a way of maintaining my integrity. But I recognized him.
_AM: And have you given it meaning?
_I: I have turned it into something artistic, into writing, into telling stories of my sorrows, which may be useful to others.
_AM: Very good, and… Tell me about your sexuality.
_I: For fear of sharing what I feel and am, I have hidden many of the things that I would have liked to share ahead of time, things that made me waste energy unnecessarily.
_AM: Well, the fear of the taboo, of what people will say, makes us do worse things about ourselves, until the moment we take the courage to say them, bring them to light. By doing so, you have received more love than you expected.
_I: Yes…
_AM: Because our shadows are children who are afraid, children whom we lock in a dark room, whom we mistreat. Our internal demons are emotions that, because they arise in our intestines and kidneys, we have denied as waste and treated without love, with disgust, when they are the ones that absorb the nutrients so that we can live. They just need a hug of unconditional love. Every enemy is a friend who has not received our love. All illness is the reaction of a lack of attention. All conflict is a product of resistance to giving and opening up. Every war is due to the lack of balance between all parties. Every demon is a scared angel. All rage is a repressed child. All anger is the lack of a caress. All struggle is the lack of listening. There is no evil, because evil is born from the denial of good, from ignoring the one who needed it most.
_I: I must love my shadow, that hurt child who has reacted badly for not being cared for from the beginning...
_AM: Remember, in the Sacrum is the engine of all emotion, materialized in the digestive system made up of the Gallbladder, Intestines, Kidneys and Bladder. They take all the nutrients, and even though their visible result is your body's waste, pee and poop (which will be used as fertilizer by nature), the invisible result is also your blood, your strength, your vitality and all your emotions.
_I: All the emotion that is born from me is the final product of my shadows and lights... And in this game, I am the Darkness...
_AM: And I am the Light.