Pulse
_AM: What are you feeling today?
_I: Exhaustion. As if I didn't want to do anything. I feel like a metamorphosis is happening inside me and I find myself entering the process of becoming a chrysalis. I feel precisely the sensation of the wave going down, entering into a conscious depression of going inward.
_AM: This is just the warm-up for what you've come to do. Your body is recognizing the things it needs to let go of in order to move forward now.
_I: Today in the pyramid I faced one of the messages that I have long sought to deny, and the things I was receiving yesterday began to make more sense. Part of my mission, of the things that I have been rejecting for 900 years…
_AM: Everything is beginning to exert its force on you... What do you feel?
_I: I feel like a kind of existential crisis but in reverse. Instead of losing the meaning of things, all the separate stories of my life and my lives begin to make more and more sense, and in that epiphany, instead of feeling euphoria, I feel depression...
_AM: Because the result is precisely what you always denied...
_I: I don't want to be what I'm supposed to be... And even though my mind in a way accepts it, accepts the responsibility, my body continues to refuse. I feel like I don't want to stop being what I am to be what I really am.
_AM: Go from the caterpillar to the butterfly. Both are part of you, you don't stop being a caterpillar when you become a butterfly, you have only raised the vibration of your caterpillar state.
_I: Even so, the caterpillar feels death... Not knowing what it will be...
_AM: But inside him there is the pulse that leads him to know that he will be resurrected. What is your pulse?
_I: Yes... I'm sorry, maybe I've started mourning a part of me ahead of time... Since I was little I have always said that I had agreed on two certain moments of death in this life: one at the age of 33, and the other at my 87 years old. Yesterday I realized that death is near. In the fictional story I wrote, “The Great Inheritance,” my death at the age of 87 in the area of La Esperanza (province of Río Negro, Argentina), was announced by an eclipse that let me know that I should leave a message in a parallel reality: “try again, this time without being afraid to be, and become who I was supposed to be.” That eclipse will occur this coming December 14, 2020. And even though I realized this about 4 months ago or so, it is today that I begin to assimilate it. I'm afraid of stopping being who I am, or dying trying during the eclipse...
_AM: Death is a gift, in which you will not lose your Self, but you will join me, as one, to be I AM. A single heartbeat. A single Pulse.
_I: Reborn as someone who overcomes, adding, not subtracting, well.
_AM: It is the only way to be One, when the parts are integrated.
_I: Become a complete pulse…
_AM: The Sacred Heart. But you don't fear this heartbeat in you, but what this generates in those around you.
_I: …Yes… Many times I am what I am for fear of losing those close to me, of them believing that I am someone else, of the typical comment “you have changed, you are no longer the same as before.”
_AM: People's fear is of change, not transformation. The change is a medium turn of 180 degrees. In a human perspective it is changing from day to night, or turning your back on someone by turning on yourself. People fear 180 degree changes, because they feel ignored, abandoned, seeing something they are not used to. And those who changed find themselves seeing a totally new panorama and horizon, and to advance in it they must leave behind many of those they knew. The path does not ask you to change. On the contrary, it asks you to Transform yourself. Transforming is a 360 degree turn, in which turning on yourself, you observe all the possible horizons and possibilities that you have, you recognize what you could not see because your back was turned, but you return to your same position with greater knowledge, perspective, wisdom and capabilities; all of this ready to be shared with your loved ones, and with many more. Changes hurt, transformations expand.
_I: I understand... Yes, my concern is always what I can generate in others from my pulse.
_AM: The energies that we generate when pulsing create magnetic waves and electrical reactions in the environment that surrounds us, which in living organisms, like other people, produce energetic movements that generate discharges that create emotions. Therefore, it is our actions or inactions that also produce great movements outside. And this is what sometimes, for fear of harming others, leads us to hold back on our own truths. How many people deprive themselves of being who they are knowing that when they act they will pulse an energy that will make others react with new emotions? But the truth is that you cannot be responsible for how others assimilate information, but rather for how you use it. You cannot take charge of other people's emotions, only personal intentions.
_I: So I must be coherent and harmonious with what arises from me for others, but if the positive that I exhale is received as negative by someone, it is not my fault, but it is simply because of that person's energy filters. .
_AM: Energy communication is like communication in different languages, you get lost in translation. Everyone has their own dialect, and there are words that, no matter how identical, mean totally different things to others.
_I: Like some verbs between Spanish and Argentine... That bring a lot of confusion, but also humor.
_AM: An energetic misinterpretation is the same as a linguistic misinterpretation. A misplaced comma or period, a spelling error, make a difference, but no matter how well you write, if the reader is from another culture or has another level of reading interpretation, the message will be distorted no matter what you do. Therefore, you cannot blame yourself for not having control of how others will assimilate the information, each of your pulses, but you must take care of putting the best of yourself so that it is the most balanced, harmonious and coherent pulse possible.
_I: Yes, I must take care of myself and not so much of how others receive it, because if I am coherent, the pulse of my being will come resonantly as coherence.
_AM: Therefore, ask yourself: how and from where do you emit your pulses to the world? This is your task for today. Identify your energetic and emotional projections. Just as the emotions you feel are a product of the reactions of external pulses, each of your own pulses (and by that I mean attitudes, actions, intentions, emotions, expressions, etc.), all of them generate reactions in your external world, causing emotions in those around you. So what emotions do you generate in others? What do you project?
_I: I can say that I manage to identify what I project actively and passively. On the active side, I usually seek to provoke emotions on purpose through what I write and communicate, which awakens many emotions in others, of all kinds. And in the passive aspect, I have noticed throughout my life that with my indifference or silences, or with my simple absence, strong emotional reactions are generated in others. This makes me understand the importance of my word and my silence.
_AM: They are your pulses. Each one has different ways of provoking emotions in others. Today is the day to think about what I press out. And to do this, you must accept what you are. Don't be afraid, this time you can do it...
_I: I take a deep breath… And I know I will, I just have to take advantage of this moment of fall to understand it.
_AM: I'll be waiting for you at the top of the wave.